The Bachelorette Week 9: Hey, did you guys know Jed is a musician?!
FINALLY HOMETOWNS! Was anyone else starting to get super bored with the regular episodes? I feel like Hannah's favorite guys have been pretty clear since week one, so I'm not totally surprised who we have hometowns with, even though Luke P continues to torment us. Let's get into it.
Pilot Peter's Hometown in the Sky
Internally I was like, please Pilot Peter, we know you won't let us down, but we need you to fly Hannah around in a plane we have quite literally waited all season. It happened, of course. But what we didn't expect was Hannah finding a condom in his car. We also didn't expect him to flex his Mercedes and his plane all at once. Is baby-face Peter both rich and a little freaky? I'm overwhelmed????
When we got to his house to meet his family, I mean, we thought he couldn't get better than he did. We learned Pter has been hiding a little Cuban spice from us, so I guess he is really just a gift that keeps on giving. His family did the most adorable German chant before dinner and I have literally no idea why, but I loved every second of it. Peter when above and beyond. He was not just a participant in said chant, he was a PERFORMER ok he grabbed this moment by the horns and ran with it.
To give you a brief rundown of his family, there's a couple of really important things. Firstly, HE HAS A BROTHER. Second, his mom is just too precious for me to handle. She so cute she loves her son so much and I just want to hug her. I need Hannah to understand that Peter's mom is the kind of grandmother you want your children to have. She's going to make them cookies. She will surprise them with presents. She will watch them every single time you need a minute with your husband. I'm just saying she should really think this through. And last, his dad cried big manly tears. He has a strong dad stache and a chain. I can't even explain to you how badly dad tears hurt me. This was a perfect hometown with a perfectly normal and loving family and I'm almost upset that they had put me through the craziness of the Bachelor franchise.
In conclusion, we stan Peter's family to the furthest extent of the law, thank you very much.
Tyler C in paradise or Jupiter, Florida
Another week of this show, another week to be totally overwhelmed by Tyler. Thank god he lives in Florida which is a state where shirts are absolutely optional. The first half of this date was mostly just Tyler shirtless while talking about his love for his friends and family, and most importantly his dad. If you missed it, his dad had been really sick right before Tyler left for the show. Tyler's pure and angelic soul is torn apart to be away from him, but it really shows how seriously he takes his relationship with Hannah. It's clear to actually everyone except for Hannah who "still has some concerns about Tyler." I can't even get into that, I'll get too upset. He compared her to a lighthouse which I realize makes him sound like a character in a Nicholas Sparks novel, but I still believe every word he says.
Tyler took Hannah to meet his parents and siblings in the tightest pants the world has ever seen. It was an act of kindness and spandex unlike anything I've ever known. His reunion with his father was so emotional and you know I cried. His father is so kind and pure just like his son. He had a beautiful conversation with Hannah. Tyler's brothers explained to Hannah how his father's sickness really allowed Tyler to step up as a man and be there for his family. So, thank god she's falling in love with Jed and searching for the good in Luke P, but I digress.
In conclusion, Tyler C is a grown man who can take care of you with an ass that just won't quit. Break his heart, and bachelor nation might just break you.
Luke P's hometown which we must assume is an alternate universe
Luke's hometown date was just another excuse for him to tell his shower story on TV once more. Except this time, he could up the drama by telling it to a bunch of fake friends as Hannah looks on. It more or less looked like a church service by Luke and about Luke. Can't wait for him to really drive home next week by judging Hannah for all of her actions. Hannah bought into everything of course.
I can't lie and said I paid attention to every bit of this date, because I'm just so bored and annoyed every time he's on my TV. It's becoming physically challenging to watch him. The only bright spot was Hannah telling his entire family that he's been the worst, and everyone hates him. She actually allowed his family to gather around her on the couch while she explained that for three weeks all she did was yell at him, which is kind of a mood. His family seemed very sure that the person Hannah was describing was not Luke, and all I have to say is I genuinely feel bad that they've had to watch their son act like he has for the past 8 weeks. I got the vibe that in real life, they must be absolutely mortified right now.
Oh and Hannah's falling for Luke. Which still sucks but just wait until next week.
In conclusion, Luke P's family doesn't deserve what he is putting them through, and he's absolutely grounded right now.
Jed's publicity stunt...I mean hometown date
Hannah and Jed start this date at - you guessed it - a recording studio!!!!!! SHOCKER!!!!
Admittedly I tuned out from the beginning of Jed's little song moment because I will not support his debut single at the expense of Hannah's heartbreak. Absolutely not sir. He says I love you to her in said recording studio to really drive home the point that he needs his love for her to lead to a successful music career or he will not be able to feed himself. Every girl's dream.
Jed's family was...well...rude? Kind of? First off, he really did the utter most making sure that all members of his family used all available screen time to promote his music career. Second, they all really seem to be banking on him being successful at music, but has anyone told them that he sucks??? I'm kind of nervous for them. And finally, their hesitation and shade towards Hannah would have been very well understood under normal circumstances. But I thought it was kind of bold for a family that probably knew he had another girlfriend 4 weeks ago but whatever.
In conclusion, Luke P's hometown date was better and that's actually so embarrassing.
Tough choice right? So she asks Chris Harrison for another rose and will be bringing all four men to the fantasy suites. Giant yikes for the good guys. Can't wait to see how that works out for her next week.
Pilot Peter's Hometown in the Sky
Internally I was like, please Pilot Peter, we know you won't let us down, but we need you to fly Hannah around in a plane we have quite literally waited all season. It happened, of course. But what we didn't expect was Hannah finding a condom in his car. We also didn't expect him to flex his Mercedes and his plane all at once. Is baby-face Peter both rich and a little freaky? I'm overwhelmed????
When we got to his house to meet his family, I mean, we thought he couldn't get better than he did. We learned Pter has been hiding a little Cuban spice from us, so I guess he is really just a gift that keeps on giving. His family did the most adorable German chant before dinner and I have literally no idea why, but I loved every second of it. Peter when above and beyond. He was not just a participant in said chant, he was a PERFORMER ok he grabbed this moment by the horns and ran with it.
To give you a brief rundown of his family, there's a couple of really important things. Firstly, HE HAS A BROTHER. Second, his mom is just too precious for me to handle. She so cute she loves her son so much and I just want to hug her. I need Hannah to understand that Peter's mom is the kind of grandmother you want your children to have. She's going to make them cookies. She will surprise them with presents. She will watch them every single time you need a minute with your husband. I'm just saying she should really think this through. And last, his dad cried big manly tears. He has a strong dad stache and a chain. I can't even explain to you how badly dad tears hurt me. This was a perfect hometown with a perfectly normal and loving family and I'm almost upset that they had put me through the craziness of the Bachelor franchise.
In conclusion, we stan Peter's family to the furthest extent of the law, thank you very much.
Tyler C in paradise or Jupiter, Florida
Another week of this show, another week to be totally overwhelmed by Tyler. Thank god he lives in Florida which is a state where shirts are absolutely optional. The first half of this date was mostly just Tyler shirtless while talking about his love for his friends and family, and most importantly his dad. If you missed it, his dad had been really sick right before Tyler left for the show. Tyler's pure and angelic soul is torn apart to be away from him, but it really shows how seriously he takes his relationship with Hannah. It's clear to actually everyone except for Hannah who "still has some concerns about Tyler." I can't even get into that, I'll get too upset. He compared her to a lighthouse which I realize makes him sound like a character in a Nicholas Sparks novel, but I still believe every word he says.
Tyler took Hannah to meet his parents and siblings in the tightest pants the world has ever seen. It was an act of kindness and spandex unlike anything I've ever known. His reunion with his father was so emotional and you know I cried. His father is so kind and pure just like his son. He had a beautiful conversation with Hannah. Tyler's brothers explained to Hannah how his father's sickness really allowed Tyler to step up as a man and be there for his family. So, thank god she's falling in love with Jed and searching for the good in Luke P, but I digress.
In conclusion, Tyler C is a grown man who can take care of you with an ass that just won't quit. Break his heart, and bachelor nation might just break you.
Luke P's hometown which we must assume is an alternate universe
Luke's hometown date was just another excuse for him to tell his shower story on TV once more. Except this time, he could up the drama by telling it to a bunch of fake friends as Hannah looks on. It more or less looked like a church service by Luke and about Luke. Can't wait for him to really drive home next week by judging Hannah for all of her actions. Hannah bought into everything of course.
I can't lie and said I paid attention to every bit of this date, because I'm just so bored and annoyed every time he's on my TV. It's becoming physically challenging to watch him. The only bright spot was Hannah telling his entire family that he's been the worst, and everyone hates him. She actually allowed his family to gather around her on the couch while she explained that for three weeks all she did was yell at him, which is kind of a mood. His family seemed very sure that the person Hannah was describing was not Luke, and all I have to say is I genuinely feel bad that they've had to watch their son act like he has for the past 8 weeks. I got the vibe that in real life, they must be absolutely mortified right now.
Oh and Hannah's falling for Luke. Which still sucks but just wait until next week.
In conclusion, Luke P's family doesn't deserve what he is putting them through, and he's absolutely grounded right now.
Jed's publicity stunt...I mean hometown date
Hannah and Jed start this date at - you guessed it - a recording studio!!!!!! SHOCKER!!!!
Admittedly I tuned out from the beginning of Jed's little song moment because I will not support his debut single at the expense of Hannah's heartbreak. Absolutely not sir. He says I love you to her in said recording studio to really drive home the point that he needs his love for her to lead to a successful music career or he will not be able to feed himself. Every girl's dream.
Jed's family was...well...rude? Kind of? First off, he really did the utter most making sure that all members of his family used all available screen time to promote his music career. Second, they all really seem to be banking on him being successful at music, but has anyone told them that he sucks??? I'm kind of nervous for them. And finally, their hesitation and shade towards Hannah would have been very well understood under normal circumstances. But I thought it was kind of bold for a family that probably knew he had another girlfriend 4 weeks ago but whatever.
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| I have attached this national geographic quality photo of a rat in his natural habitat |
The Rose Ceremony
Hannah gives Pter a rose, an appropriate thank you for the plane ride. Hannah gives Tyler a rose, because literally why wouldn't you. So, then she's left with one rose and two incredibly appealing options, as shown below
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- Those Girls You Know
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